Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Daytona: Delayed Reaction

I've been meaning to do this all week, but things just kept getting in the way (like this "job" thing...whatever...). Last year's race season was a complete wash for me. Seriously, I could probably count on one hand the number of races I watched all the way through. Something about the combination of yawn-worthy competition, Junior lame duck-ness, broadcaster inanity overload and Jimmie Johnson coming back like Jason in the "Friday the 13th" movies made me just want to stab myself in the eye with a lit cigarette.

So - don't ask me why - but I was really pumped to watch the Daytona 500 on Sunday. I'm maybe 95% of the way to accepting that Dale Jr. is now a Hendrick driver, and being okay with that. Even better, Jr. was looking really good in the preseason, winning the Bud Shootout and his Gatorade 150 duel. Besides, it was thte 50th running of the 500 - how could I not watch?

Overall, I wasn't disappointed too badly. Of course I would've liked my guy to win, but I'm cool with a team-best (and Chevy-best) top ten. A few thoughts:

- I mean, it's Fox, so my expectations weren't exactly high to begin with...but I do have a few quibbles about the coverage. The main quibble being that Chris Myers is still allowed within 100 yards of a camera, but I guess I'm just going to have to get past that one. I liked the decade-by-decade retrospective of the 500's history, but I really could have done without Mike Joy's costumes and the over-the-top background music. Yeah, I'm totally sure that the late-70's era NASCAR crowd dressed like that. Right.

- While we're on the subject of Fox's coverage, I also have to give kudos to the panel discussion with past 500-winners, and the group interview with Cale Yarborough and the Allisons. I thought those guys were going to start flinging helmets again there for a second. Absolutely rocked.

- Fox's in-race stuff hasn't changed much. Someone still thinks Darrell Waltrip's little green-flag tagline (which WILL NOT be given press here) is amusing. And the Fox people still lack a certain, er, sense of their place in the world. For instance, they still insist on referring to the "lucky dog rule" as the "free pass," even though everyone involved in NASCAR from the fans to the officials calls it "the lucky dog rule." You know why? Remember who coined the term "lucky dog rule"? The NBC people. So, to recap, a term has permeated the sport's lexicon to the point where even the competition director uses it, but Fox won't do the same because a rival broadcast team came up with it. Same with their new "gopher cam" - great name, great little cartoon of a screaming about-to-be-run-over gopher, but...Didn't ESPN or somebody have an in-ground camera last year? Like I said, I didn't watch a lot of racing , so I can't be sure. Fox isn't exactly reinventing the wheel here, but still, they're all "OOH! Gopher cam! Gopher cam! Give us an Emmy!"

- Whoever planned the pre-race stuff - NASCAR or the speedway staff - did an excellent job rounding up the winners from previous years. I don't know about you guys, but I'd much rather see Richard Petty and Junior Johnson and the others giving the start command, waving the flag, etc., then some B-list celebrity.

- But there's one area where the planners whiffed, big-time. The music. For the pre-race concert, you had Chubby Checker (who killed, btw), Michael McDonald (zzzzzzzzz), Kool and the Gang ("and this year's Daytona 500 will be brought to you from the elevator in your doctor's office") and Brooks&Dunn. Michael McDonald??????????? Okay, even if you buy that whole "music from each decade" thing, wtf is he doing there? Seriously, who put the DJ from my grandmother's nursing home in charge of this thing? When Chubby Checker is the high energy point in your concert, you have serious problems.

- I'm not pissed at Jr's pit moves (or lack thereof) there toward the end. It's all about taking chances - you win some, you lose some. And I'm relatively cool with Ryan Newman. Sure, I'd rather have seen Tony Stewart take the checkers, but at least it wasn't Kyle Busch. Yecch. (The "When will Tony Stewart squash Kyle Busch like a bug?" pool starts here. I'm calling Bristol.)

Okay, I have an issue and I need help. I was supposed to meet my friend Ginger for dinner Sunday, and since she only lives a few blocks from me, I made the drive during the endless stream of late-race cautions. So, I get to her house, we chit-chat, pour our wine, start dinner...and by the time we turn the race on, there's been another wreck. They flash the little graphic telling who was involved in the crash, and I see "Jimmie Johnson."

"Oh, good!" I thought, before I could catch myself. It was a totally involuntary response, I couldn't help it. And I immediately fely guilty. Johnson's a teammate now - I should stop hating him, right?

Except that I can't. I found myself telling Ginger about Johnson's smart-ass "this is for the haters" Victory Lane speech when he won the 500 ("What a punk," she said.), and about pretty much every whiny, horrid, punky thing either he or Chad Knauss has ever done going back to the third grade, and I realized...I have a serious problem. I really need to get over this, but I just can't.

So, should I even try? Or is it okay to still irrationally despise one of my driver's new teammates (I was never wild about Michael Waltrip, after all...)? Look, maybe NASCAR can retroactively turn Richard Petty into a "Sprint Cup Champion," but it's going to take a lot more than a little magic wand action to make me actually like Johnson.

*sigh* On to California...

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